Friday, December 22, 2006

Just Kick Me, Why Don't You?

So yesterday I was super sick. I was even running a 100 degree temperature. I managed to get it down with some Tylenol, however, and spent most of the entire day wrapped up on the couch.

Even though it was a Thursday and I should have been at work, a lot of my friends seemed to have this sixth sense that I was home, because calls kept rolling in all day.

Most calls I did not take because I simply was not capable of getting up, but when I saw my best friend (really former best friend) had left messages on my cell, home, and work lines, I mustered the energy to call her back. Now, a bit of background, she is the uber-fertile with a not-yet-1 year old baby who has been completely oblivious to my infertility and told me all about how she was going to start trying again for #2 in the spring after I told her about my pregnancy (from this post).

Well, you guessed it. Just like uberfertile friend #1 who was going to start trying this month, she is already pregnant quite acidentally. She was quite distraught when I spoke to her on the phone. Evidently, she had peed on a stick just an hour before she called me and was freaking out. She was going on about how she was NOT ready to be pregnant again and how it was going to suck and how she had just called her husband in tears (not of joy) with the news. How messed up is it to call your husband miserable with news of a pregnancy. I mean, afterall, they did want another, and were going to start trying again soon. Ugh.

I'm not sure what she wanted me to say. I mean, she has no clue about my IF, but she knows it took me awhile and she knows that I'm thrilled about my pregnancy. So it's not like I was going to commiserate with her and be like--yeah, bummer for you.

It's just not fair to everyone struggling to have kids.

So my friend says she has "no idea" how she got pregnant, saying her hubbie has been using condoms. She remarked that she supposed he was putting them on too late in the game. Ugh, TMI! And come on, don't they know how to use condoms by now? The awful part is that Baby #1 was also very "unplanned," so you think she would have learned by now. She was just as upset to learn about her first pregnancy as this one, even though she has always wanted kids. So, I listened to her talk for awhile, but when she started going on about all the awful pregnancy symptoms she was dreading I had to let her go, blaming my cold. I did tell her that she should really feel lucky that she gets pregnant so easily, because it's not that way for everyone.

H was just livid when I relayed the conversation to him. He has no respect for her at all anymore. He felt that way when she reacted like that to Baby #1, and back then we didn't even know we had a problem for sure.

Anyway, at least the other phone calls that came in yesterday were good--news of friends getting engaged and stuff, and some people who I e-mailed about the boys called me with congratulations.

I now think everybody who could be pregnant in my circle of friends/family is pregnant, so at least I'll have no more announcements of successful pee sticks for awhile! Here's the baby breakdown--My neighbor friend is due in late April, I'm due in May, my sister in June, uberfertile friend #1 in July, former best friend in August.

Given all that, I am beyond grateful that God/the universe/forces beyond my control decided to give me with a positive IVF cycle, because I'm not sure I could have handled this absolute onslaught of 2007 pregnancies otherwise. I think H and I would have moved or been committed to a mental institution.


Anonymous said...

I'm sorry about your friend! I just don't get how people can be so thoughtless.

I was just thinking that for a long while I haven't had any pregnancy announcements because we had a slew of them in 2005. I'm bracing myself for an influx of 2nd babies this year as well as first's for friends on the brink of TTC.

GLouise said...

Wow! Talk about the good ol' pee stick still being wet! Eww!

Why do people call the ENTIRE UNIVERSE after taking just one HPT?!

Anonymous said...

Geez, did she think you were going to say "Yeah you're right - I hate being pregnant - this sucks???!"

Some people just don't get it.

UtRus said...

not very sensitive. but i always tell myself, when people seem to be so clueless about what we've gone through - that they really, truly don't know. It's pure ignorance in the real sense. people aren't trying to be buttwads, they just haven't had an experience remotely like infertility, so they are blind.

I hope you feel better soon. No fun being sick. Especially when you just posted about how you're beginning to feel better overall.

by the way, congrats on your boy and boy!! we are having a boy and a girl and I am about 1 month behind you. I'll be checking back in! hugs and happy holidays to you.

Rhianyn said...

You handled that very well. I had to refrain from killing my cousin over the weekend while listening to her talk about how much she wants another child, but she thinks she's just too old to start all that again. (She's 32.) I really wanted to just slap her. :-)

J said...

Some people just dont get it, there are so many people out there that want so bad and have to put up such a fight!
I suffered from different infertility problems (and I could never say I totally understand how you feel) but I now have 2 DD's conceived after they found my issue (I have PCOS).
Congrats on the boys that is awesome.